Stupid things the male species will do

So today was the day. Apparently before I started working at my current job, someone made a dare. The dare was for each guy to grow a mustache, or creepy handlebar things, depending on the depravity of the guy. Today was the culmination of a months worth of hard and careful planning. The guys posed for pictures and then most promptly shaved. This is testimony for why there are more women than men in the world. It also explains why more women are going lesbian. Although I have to say, from my point of view, there are a lot of things (most things actually) a woman will never be able to do for me. I guess I will have to continue to sort through the chaff till I find that holy grail of men that I am told one day I will find. (I think it will be less holy grail, more smart enough to be trainable.) Now if you have ever wondered how the human populace continues to thrive, this post will not help you answer that question. I personally think that it is a requirement that all males be dropped on their heads shortly after birth to help them level the playing field so to speak. This thought helps me to rationalize all the stupid things they do. I will say, that to their credit, it was entirely amusing. I just never cease to be amazed by male bravado/stupidity. I don't know why it continues to entertain and bemuse me, but it does. Maybe it's just cause I like men so much. Whatever the reason, here are the pictures taken by Jess R. Thanks Jess, these are great!

L to R Andy, Taco, Chad, Jeff, Jon

They want to be in Happy Days

Locally Owned Go Green

I stepped outside today to find a bright yellow door hanger that says "Weedman Go Green!!!" Yes it actually had three exclamation points. It says Go Green, so I am immediately curious. Everyone wants to be green these days. I have no problem with that. I recycle. I don't litter. I do the little things I can to try and make the world a better place. Green is good if it is real. Well, reading this door hanger I am instantly disappointed. The Green this hanger is talking about, is green lawn. OK I still get it, reading further. Oh, the use of chemicals in granular form to get a great lawn. So really not Green, just green.
I am just upset by this door hanger! I was initially caught up and that makes me mad. I have dogs. I try not to use chemicals on the lawn that could be harmful to them. It means my back yard does not look great, but the pets are healthy so I am happy. I try to use local plants that use less water. I don't water unless I have to. What upsets me is that they took an idiom that people automatically associate with non harmful to the environment, and use it to catch people's attention. At least they blatantly say they use chemicals. The thing is there are a lot of stupid people in the world that will automatically assume that because they say "go green" that they mean, non harmful and call because they are doing the world a favor.
The next thing that gets me is that is says in underlined form "Locally owned and operated." It also says it is the second largest lawn care company in North America. I think to myself, how did a local business get so big and I don't know about it? So I go to the website. Seems like, it's only a local dealership. Which means it's corporate, and someone here, bought a building and is doing what corporate tells them. This is not what I think of as locally owned.Does it in it's essence cover the "locally owned" description? Yes it does. But locally owned in my mind, is an entrepreneur from right here in my town, that decided to open a business. It's this entrepreneur's idea, or at least his take on the idea, and they are making a go of their dream. For example: John decides to open a sandwich shop downtown. This idea is not a new idea, but his version of sandwiches are all island themed ingredients and styles. It's a Caribbean style sandwich place. He's always wanted to open a Caribbean sandwich shop with Jerk sandwiches and Red Stripe beer and now he has. This to me is the quintessential "locally owned" idea. It is not someone with no imagination who just wanted to make money, bought into corporate world and sold corporate ideas. A dealership, is not locally owned, it's corporate world brainwashing you into thinking you have bettered the locals by bringing a building with corporate "values" into it.
So I say to you Weed Man who is neither locally owned, or Green... false advertisement is like lying... lying brings bad kharma, and as I have said before, bad kharma is a SOB.

The economy takes a chunk out of Girl Scout Cookies

First of all, I think the Girl Scouts found some highly addictive ingredient or substance that is still untraceable. They have been feeding the habits of the American people for decades. And then to make sure no one gets their fix for long, they take the cookies off the market for most of the year. Brilliant and devious all at the same time. But I truly believe that Girl Scout cookies are 100 percent addictive. I don't care what Lays say about "you can't eat just one." Lays got nothing on the Girl Scouts.
Now,having said that, it seems that not even America's favorite cookies are recession proof. Rising costs bite into Girl Scout Cookie portions News for Dallas, Texas Dallas Morning News Cooking tips Food Dall... There will be fewer cookies in the boxes of several varieties this year, including my Thin Mints. As if they didn't go fast enough before, now there will be less of them! I am gonna have to rob somebody like the rest of the drug addicts, to make sure I can afford my fix of cookies! It's almost enough to make a fat girl cry. At least the Caramel delights are safe... for now!
"Help us Obi wan Kenobe, you're our only hope!" Aside from downsizing portions, they are also just downsizing. The lemon cookies are going to be smaller. I guess the smaller cookies will match up with the smaller packaging they are putting the cookies into. Less packaging means less cost. I get that, but the cookies are already four dollars a box. Divide that into the fewer cookies and we'll be paying a dollar a piece soon.
At least I can say the info wasn't leaked, and there were no secret labs. No one had to hold on to boxes from last year to compare to this years to prove the truth ( Thank you Cadbury Eggs) The Girl Scouts told us themselves it was coming. But why should they worry? They have a country full of addicts who need their cookie fix.

Salmonella outbreak is from Georgia

Not that we need more proof that Corporate America cares only about profits, not about people; but we have another one anyway. FDA Finds Many Problems at Peanut Plant Americans outsource everything, and it is beginning to become clear why. First there was the E-coli break out on Spinach and now Salmonella in Peanut butter. I am not saying that I want us to outsource things. Outsourcing is part of what is killing our economy. The topic at hand, however, is peanut butter. The government believes it has located the source of the salmonella outbreak and it's in Georgia.
First off, the FDA knew there was a problem. They posted several of these problems in a report on the Internet. These reports included that Peanut Corp. had found salmonella in a dozen internal tests over the past two years. The managers shipped the product anyway. Are there no decent human beings left working in the corporate world? Are we going on the mantra "no harm no foul" or maybe it's "they'll never link it to us!" What is human life compared to corporate profit? Nothing apparently. More than five hundred people have gotten sick and 8 are dead!
Did the FDA do anything? Well they issued reports. Outstanding. Did anyone read them? Cockroaches and leaking water (which by the way water makes salmonella really happy). The thing is, the FDA really can't do much. They are virtually powerless. So they can suggest things be changed and they can write reports. Well making suggestions to people who knowingly would sell food contaminated with salmonella is like suggesting to the mob that they not be bad guys anymore. Well dually noted, but I think we'll keep doing what we're doing cause it's making us money.
And talk about stupid criminals (cause criminals they are). Did they not think that with all the transportation logs, and product labels and etc that eventually when the product they KNEW was tainted finally made people sick that they wouldn't get caught? And gauranteed, the managers that authorized the shipment immediately went home and told their families not to buy or eat the stuff.
I just can't understand how greed can surpass human life. Could they not think of the children? I don't even like children that much, but to send out a product that is a main food staple for the majority of kids in this country is unconscionable. It's like we've stepped into Scrooge's world and it's ok to let people die "to decrease the surplus population." I just cannot fathom rationalizing in my mind the thought--as long as we make our numbers and profits this month, a few casualties are ok. I just don't get it.

Mercury in High Fructose Corn Syrup

I have been trying to cut out HFCS in my diet. It has been hard because EVERYTHING has it. But now there is a better reason than even diebetes and obesity. Mercury is now linked to one third of all HFCS. You can read more here : The Ethicurean: Chew the right thing. » Blog Archive » PR debacle for HFCS: Care for some mercury with your oatmeal?

Tragic and inhumane

Every winter this kind of article will come out, and sadly sometimes more than one. The article reads man or woman aged 75 plus freezes to death in home. This is ridiculous Today's article (AP News) reads Man, 93, Freezes to Death in Home. I can see NO logical reason for this to happen. The municipal power company in the man's home of Bay City, Michigan put a power restrictor on his home. When the power limit is reached the power turns off and won't come on until it is reset, I asume, by said power company. This just makes me crazy angry! This man lived through World War II, the Korean war, The Cold War, The moon landing, Vietnam and the Civil rights movement, and died because his power got turned off! This is not only unecessary, but it is a painful, slow way to die.

Now I understand that the power company is a business, and this man had unpaid bills, but I am sure he was on a fixed income and the recession has hurt everyone. But couldn't you as a responsible bussiness wait till spring? Or if nothing else, as human being couldn' t you wait? But it really pisses me off that the company did not feel they had done anything wrong. Are you Kidding me? You turned off power to a 93 year old mans home in the middle of winter in a town just off the Great Lakes! How can you think you did nothing wrong? You killed a man over money. If you had been a single person instead of a company you would be locked away for murder! The neighbors of this man found him with ice on the INSIDE of his windows. The temperature was less than 32 degrees!

What really gets me about this whole abomination is that the manager, Robert Belleman, said that they were going to review the policies at Bay City Electric Light And Power, but he didn't believe they did anything wrong. What's even worse is that he tries to lay the blame off on neighbors. He says that neighbors should keep an eye on neighbors, and that if they think something is wrong then they should report it to the proper authorities. I have heard some bull shit in my time but this disgusts me with it's vulgarity. Belleman says that they are a poor little helpless power company doing what they had to while a man froze to death in his own home because he had no family to turn to. He wants to say that it is the neighbors fault for not keeping up with this man! There are so many things wrong with that statement that I don't even know where to begin. What happened to human decency? It was the middle of winter in MICHIGAN and this man was 93 years old! What happened to corporate responsibility? How can any human being with a soul, callously say that it was the neighbors to blame for the hypothermia death, when you turned off the power? Corruption in the government and government run business has rooted deep like a cancer growth on the bone. For that matter, the cancer is just as deep in corporate America. I just can't even fathom doing this to someone. And what is really sad is that because this man has no living family there will be no one left to stand up and cry out for vengeance! It all just makes me sick!

Sunday lunch

As is often common here in the South, my friends and I go out to lunch after church. We don't go so much for the camaraderie as to sit down and answer the hard questions in life. For example, today the discussion was what do fireflies eat? These my friends, are the tough questions we are willing to face for the betterment of people everywhere. Apparently, no one at our table of scholars knew the answer to what fireflies eat. Every child who has ever caught a lightning bug (firefly) in a mason or mayonnaise jar, knows that you must insert into said jar the mandatory stick and grass. It's in the child bug catching manual somewhere. Must have stick and grass in jar. But I can verify this; lightning bugs do not eat either stick or grass. So what does it eat? Well, I will tell you. They eat pollen, insects and other fireflies. Yes folks, those sweet little glowing creatures are cannibals. I guess adding pollen to their diets gives them the fiber they need. All adults must consider fiber after all. Apparently fireflies can not live solely off flesh like the rugby team in the Andes mountains did. So there you have it. One less hard question in life that you will have to ponder. And should you ever be watching Jeopardy and this comes up, then you will be able to confidently say... "What is Pollen, Insects and other fireflies Alex?"