Stupid things the male species will do

So today was the day. Apparently before I started working at my current job, someone made a dare. The dare was for each guy to grow a mustache, or creepy handlebar things, depending on the depravity of the guy. Today was the culmination of a months worth of hard and careful planning. The guys posed for pictures and then most promptly shaved. This is testimony for why there are more women than men in the world. It also explains why more women are going lesbian. Although I have to say, from my point of view, there are a lot of things (most things actually) a woman will never be able to do for me. I guess I will have to continue to sort through the chaff till I find that holy grail of men that I am told one day I will find. (I think it will be less holy grail, more smart enough to be trainable.) Now if you have ever wondered how the human populace continues to thrive, this post will not help you answer that question. I personally think that it is a requirement that all males be dropped on their heads shortly after birth to help them level the playing field so to speak. This thought helps me to rationalize all the stupid things they do. I will say, that to their credit, it was entirely amusing. I just never cease to be amazed by male bravado/stupidity. I don't know why it continues to entertain and bemuse me, but it does. Maybe it's just cause I like men so much. Whatever the reason, here are the pictures taken by Jess R. Thanks Jess, these are great!

L to R Andy, Taco, Chad, Jeff, Jon

They want to be in Happy Days

Locally Owned Go Green

I stepped outside today to find a bright yellow door hanger that says "Weedman Go Green!!!" Yes it actually had three exclamation points. It says Go Green, so I am immediately curious. Everyone wants to be green these days. I have no problem with that. I recycle. I don't litter. I do the little things I can to try and make the world a better place. Green is good if it is real. Well, reading this door hanger I am instantly disappointed. The Green this hanger is talking about, is green lawn. OK I still get it, reading further. Oh, the use of chemicals in granular form to get a great lawn. So really not Green, just green.
I am just upset by this door hanger! I was initially caught up and that makes me mad. I have dogs. I try not to use chemicals on the lawn that could be harmful to them. It means my back yard does not look great, but the pets are healthy so I am happy. I try to use local plants that use less water. I don't water unless I have to. What upsets me is that they took an idiom that people automatically associate with non harmful to the environment, and use it to catch people's attention. At least they blatantly say they use chemicals. The thing is there are a lot of stupid people in the world that will automatically assume that because they say "go green" that they mean, non harmful and call because they are doing the world a favor.
The next thing that gets me is that is says in underlined form "Locally owned and operated." It also says it is the second largest lawn care company in North America. I think to myself, how did a local business get so big and I don't know about it? So I go to the website. Seems like, it's only a local dealership. Which means it's corporate, and someone here, bought a building and is doing what corporate tells them. This is not what I think of as locally owned.Does it in it's essence cover the "locally owned" description? Yes it does. But locally owned in my mind, is an entrepreneur from right here in my town, that decided to open a business. It's this entrepreneur's idea, or at least his take on the idea, and they are making a go of their dream. For example: John decides to open a sandwich shop downtown. This idea is not a new idea, but his version of sandwiches are all island themed ingredients and styles. It's a Caribbean style sandwich place. He's always wanted to open a Caribbean sandwich shop with Jerk sandwiches and Red Stripe beer and now he has. This to me is the quintessential "locally owned" idea. It is not someone with no imagination who just wanted to make money, bought into corporate world and sold corporate ideas. A dealership, is not locally owned, it's corporate world brainwashing you into thinking you have bettered the locals by bringing a building with corporate "values" into it.
So I say to you Weed Man who is neither locally owned, or Green... false advertisement is like lying... lying brings bad kharma, and as I have said before, bad kharma is a SOB.

The economy takes a chunk out of Girl Scout Cookies

First of all, I think the Girl Scouts found some highly addictive ingredient or substance that is still untraceable. They have been feeding the habits of the American people for decades. And then to make sure no one gets their fix for long, they take the cookies off the market for most of the year. Brilliant and devious all at the same time. But I truly believe that Girl Scout cookies are 100 percent addictive. I don't care what Lays say about "you can't eat just one." Lays got nothing on the Girl Scouts.
Now,having said that, it seems that not even America's favorite cookies are recession proof. Rising costs bite into Girl Scout Cookie portions News for Dallas, Texas Dallas Morning News Cooking tips Food Dall... There will be fewer cookies in the boxes of several varieties this year, including my Thin Mints. As if they didn't go fast enough before, now there will be less of them! I am gonna have to rob somebody like the rest of the drug addicts, to make sure I can afford my fix of cookies! It's almost enough to make a fat girl cry. At least the Caramel delights are safe... for now!
"Help us Obi wan Kenobe, you're our only hope!" Aside from downsizing portions, they are also just downsizing. The lemon cookies are going to be smaller. I guess the smaller cookies will match up with the smaller packaging they are putting the cookies into. Less packaging means less cost. I get that, but the cookies are already four dollars a box. Divide that into the fewer cookies and we'll be paying a dollar a piece soon.
At least I can say the info wasn't leaked, and there were no secret labs. No one had to hold on to boxes from last year to compare to this years to prove the truth ( Thank you Cadbury Eggs) The Girl Scouts told us themselves it was coming. But why should they worry? They have a country full of addicts who need their cookie fix.

Salmonella outbreak is from Georgia

Not that we need more proof that Corporate America cares only about profits, not about people; but we have another one anyway. FDA Finds Many Problems at Peanut Plant Americans outsource everything, and it is beginning to become clear why. First there was the E-coli break out on Spinach and now Salmonella in Peanut butter. I am not saying that I want us to outsource things. Outsourcing is part of what is killing our economy. The topic at hand, however, is peanut butter. The government believes it has located the source of the salmonella outbreak and it's in Georgia.
First off, the FDA knew there was a problem. They posted several of these problems in a report on the Internet. These reports included that Peanut Corp. had found salmonella in a dozen internal tests over the past two years. The managers shipped the product anyway. Are there no decent human beings left working in the corporate world? Are we going on the mantra "no harm no foul" or maybe it's "they'll never link it to us!" What is human life compared to corporate profit? Nothing apparently. More than five hundred people have gotten sick and 8 are dead!
Did the FDA do anything? Well they issued reports. Outstanding. Did anyone read them? Cockroaches and leaking water (which by the way water makes salmonella really happy). The thing is, the FDA really can't do much. They are virtually powerless. So they can suggest things be changed and they can write reports. Well making suggestions to people who knowingly would sell food contaminated with salmonella is like suggesting to the mob that they not be bad guys anymore. Well dually noted, but I think we'll keep doing what we're doing cause it's making us money.
And talk about stupid criminals (cause criminals they are). Did they not think that with all the transportation logs, and product labels and etc that eventually when the product they KNEW was tainted finally made people sick that they wouldn't get caught? And gauranteed, the managers that authorized the shipment immediately went home and told their families not to buy or eat the stuff.
I just can't understand how greed can surpass human life. Could they not think of the children? I don't even like children that much, but to send out a product that is a main food staple for the majority of kids in this country is unconscionable. It's like we've stepped into Scrooge's world and it's ok to let people die "to decrease the surplus population." I just cannot fathom rationalizing in my mind the thought--as long as we make our numbers and profits this month, a few casualties are ok. I just don't get it.

Mercury in High Fructose Corn Syrup

I have been trying to cut out HFCS in my diet. It has been hard because EVERYTHING has it. But now there is a better reason than even diebetes and obesity. Mercury is now linked to one third of all HFCS. You can read more here : The Ethicurean: Chew the right thing. » Blog Archive » PR debacle for HFCS: Care for some mercury with your oatmeal?

Tragic and inhumane

Every winter this kind of article will come out, and sadly sometimes more than one. The article reads man or woman aged 75 plus freezes to death in home. This is ridiculous Today's article (AP News) reads Man, 93, Freezes to Death in Home. I can see NO logical reason for this to happen. The municipal power company in the man's home of Bay City, Michigan put a power restrictor on his home. When the power limit is reached the power turns off and won't come on until it is reset, I asume, by said power company. This just makes me crazy angry! This man lived through World War II, the Korean war, The Cold War, The moon landing, Vietnam and the Civil rights movement, and died because his power got turned off! This is not only unecessary, but it is a painful, slow way to die.

Now I understand that the power company is a business, and this man had unpaid bills, but I am sure he was on a fixed income and the recession has hurt everyone. But couldn't you as a responsible bussiness wait till spring? Or if nothing else, as human being couldn' t you wait? But it really pisses me off that the company did not feel they had done anything wrong. Are you Kidding me? You turned off power to a 93 year old mans home in the middle of winter in a town just off the Great Lakes! How can you think you did nothing wrong? You killed a man over money. If you had been a single person instead of a company you would be locked away for murder! The neighbors of this man found him with ice on the INSIDE of his windows. The temperature was less than 32 degrees!

What really gets me about this whole abomination is that the manager, Robert Belleman, said that they were going to review the policies at Bay City Electric Light And Power, but he didn't believe they did anything wrong. What's even worse is that he tries to lay the blame off on neighbors. He says that neighbors should keep an eye on neighbors, and that if they think something is wrong then they should report it to the proper authorities. I have heard some bull shit in my time but this disgusts me with it's vulgarity. Belleman says that they are a poor little helpless power company doing what they had to while a man froze to death in his own home because he had no family to turn to. He wants to say that it is the neighbors fault for not keeping up with this man! There are so many things wrong with that statement that I don't even know where to begin. What happened to human decency? It was the middle of winter in MICHIGAN and this man was 93 years old! What happened to corporate responsibility? How can any human being with a soul, callously say that it was the neighbors to blame for the hypothermia death, when you turned off the power? Corruption in the government and government run business has rooted deep like a cancer growth on the bone. For that matter, the cancer is just as deep in corporate America. I just can't even fathom doing this to someone. And what is really sad is that because this man has no living family there will be no one left to stand up and cry out for vengeance! It all just makes me sick!

Sunday lunch

As is often common here in the South, my friends and I go out to lunch after church. We don't go so much for the camaraderie as to sit down and answer the hard questions in life. For example, today the discussion was what do fireflies eat? These my friends, are the tough questions we are willing to face for the betterment of people everywhere. Apparently, no one at our table of scholars knew the answer to what fireflies eat. Every child who has ever caught a lightning bug (firefly) in a mason or mayonnaise jar, knows that you must insert into said jar the mandatory stick and grass. It's in the child bug catching manual somewhere. Must have stick and grass in jar. But I can verify this; lightning bugs do not eat either stick or grass. So what does it eat? Well, I will tell you. They eat pollen, insects and other fireflies. Yes folks, those sweet little glowing creatures are cannibals. I guess adding pollen to their diets gives them the fiber they need. All adults must consider fiber after all. Apparently fireflies can not live solely off flesh like the rugby team in the Andes mountains did. So there you have it. One less hard question in life that you will have to ponder. And should you ever be watching Jeopardy and this comes up, then you will be able to confidently say... "What is Pollen, Insects and other fireflies Alex?"

Vulcans

Flipping through the channels tonight I happened upon CNN. There on the TV was a man called Jon Lemon. If you have never seen him, then you need to check him out. I am telling you right now, there really are aliens, because there was a Vulcan on the screen before me. Now I looked up his pic on CNN.com. They angle the camera well in his photo. But if you look him dead on (like you do on TV) he has the the pointy ears and the standard Vulcan haircut just like Mr. Spock. And on top of that he's a Miss Lady. I would never have guessed that they had miss ladies on Vulcan, but Jon Lemon is the proof. Who knew!

Right before your very eyes

I just have to tell you that this post is the kind of thing that just makes me smile. Some people are just crazy. I check out the interesting news in today's headlines and see one that is just what I need after a long day. The first line of the article reads: " One of Nigeria's biggest daily newspapers reported that police implicated a goat in an attempted automobile theft. " Now this is not one of your cute, harrowing or heart wrenching stories... No siree. This was the result of fine police detective work down in that there Nigeria place.

Seems Like, What Had Happened Was...
According to a police spokesperson;two days ago two men tried to steal a Mazda. One of the "vigilantes" got away. The other one was not so lucky. When said "vigilante" was about to be apprehended by the po-lice he transformed himself into a goat.

Wow...
I'm not sure how handy a trick it would be to turn ones self into a goat. I mean if I was going to turn myself into something why not a tiger or a hawk? Then I could either have eaten the police or flown away. But a goat? Maybe the guy had a power he couldn't control and it only happens when he gets stressed out. I could certainly understand the goat thing then. I mean if you can't control morphing into an animal then how could you chose what animal you were morphing into.
It gets better...
The newspaper apparently went on to say that the police then captured said subject and paraded him before the journalists and had his picture taken. Now that is some fine police work there. Not only did you catch an evil goat changing car thief but you took the time to let people know that they were safe in your hands. Crime doesn't pay while you are on the job.
I just hope this criminal learns to control his morphing abilities soon. Doing hard time will certainly have him stressed out. Today he may be a goat, but tomorrow it could be anything. There might not be a prison farm big enough to handle that.

I must be getting old

As I was walking around on my college campus again this week for the first time in about five years; I noticed that everyone on campus seems to have gotten a lot younger. I don't remember the college students being this young the last time I was here. They certainly weren't that young when I was attending college the first time.

I had to go to the restroom between classes so I dropped off my books and headed down the hall. As I came out of the classroom there was a line of about twenty students with all their books and stuff waiting for a classroom to empty out. As I looked at these children I had a horrible flashback. Suddenly I was back in high school. I really had the thought for half a minute that a high school class was there visiting the campus on a field trip. It took me a minute to process the fact that these kids were not visiting but attending. But I could have sworn that they were no more than sixteen. It really messed me up! I called my dear college buddy and told him what had just happened. He is a copier/printer technician so he often has contracted work on one college campus or the other in the area. I had to call for back up! He was indeed able to confirm that the kids have gotten much younger. He then said, repeat after me. "We're not too old for this shit, we're not too old for this shit!" :::Sighs::: I have truly come to appreciate the way Mel Gibson and Danny Glover felt in Lethal Weapon 4 of late. Guess that just means that maybe I really am too old for this shit.

I hate pizzas from the frozen food section!

And I will tell you why. Every single time I get a pizza and make it in the oven I am starved when it finally gets ready. So I cut it up and proceed to put cheese in my mouth that is the same temperature as molten lava. I have never managed to eat the first slice without scalding the roof of my mouth! I now have a blister on the roof of my mouth that will bug me for the next week. You would think I would learn.

Goodbye fat and pasty white, hello orange and skinny!

Beware America, Illegal tanning is on the rise! There is an article on Stylist Blog about the latest trend in tanning, Melanotan. You can now get your tan by shooting up. Just what we need is more people comfortable with stabbing themselves with needles. Housewives and stay at home moms here is your answer to tanning. Of course there has been no studies to show what could happen if you use this stuff long term. The scientists will tell you that messing with your cells melanocytes can lead to cancer. I wonder if these are the same scientists who told us thalidomide was safe for pregnant women. At this point I am not really sure that there isn't anything that will not put you at risk for cancer. We live in a toxic society afterall. And heaven knows the FDA has only the power of suggestion to protect us.

Here's the kicker. It is perfectly legal to buy the substance. It is, however; illegal to sell it. That just kills me! Oh oxymoron, you strike again!

And last but not least, I noticed that one of the side effects of this injection is appetite suppression. Are you trying to Keep women from buying it, or encourage them to? What you are telling me is that I get a tan and a diet all in one shot? Where has this been all my life? I myself will wait to see how all this pans out. Besides, no one is legally allowed to sell it, just buy it, right?

Drink wine and you become a... Vampyre?

I sign on tonight to check my mail and any interesting news today to find this article. Rare Disorder Linked to Werewolf Myth (Porphyria makes you unable to be in the sun with out burning up like a vampire. Although this particular case apparently included weird facial hair growth) All the usual suspects are lined up for sacrifice; smoking, drinking, drugs, stress and sunlight. Well why don't you just add chocolate, garlic bread and pasta and make me completely miserable. Why is it that no one can find a link between exercise and cancer, or eating healthy can kill you! Nope, instead you would rather take away all my favorite vices! I think you could find a link between working out 20 minutes 3 times a week and a shorter life span, you're just not trying hard enough. They say statistics can be made to say anything you want. Well Damn it, someone make them say that I should sit around more often and stuff my face with wine and chocolate!
Well I may become a Vamp or a werewolf, but sunlight, cigarettes and wine I will see you this summer by the pool

You can't make this stuff up...

Ok, it has taken me a little while to gather my thoughts. I just had a situation happen to me last night that I can hardly believe, and I was the one it was happening to. MLK day is a day when government employees and bankers are out of work. Well, two of my friends are just such people. I had to work in the morning but had the afternoon free. The three of us decided to get together and watch movies for the day. Kay had insisted that since Jodi and I had not seen Casablanca before, that is was long over due. Jodi and I had no real objections, so we set it as a date. I got over to Jodi's condo at around 5:25 pm. I decided to have one last cigarette before I went into the house. I was on the phone so it would pass the time. Well I am standing in the yard near my car and this tow truck pulls into the complex and pulls past my car. Well I had just gotten there so I just watched with curiosity until I realized they were backing up to my car!
At this point I am very confused and ask them what is going on. They continue backing and tell me that this car has been there for a while and they are towing it. I tell them that it is my car and I will move it. (Which by law in this state they have to let me do if I offer) They tell me that they have to lift it because it has been called in and the truck they are driving logs the call and they are required to tow it. (which by the way is Bull Shit) so I try to get into my car and move it and they lift it up so I can't. I told them there was no way that they got a call cause I had just gotten there. These guys tell me that I either pay them 40 bucks or they will tow me and it will be 130 bucks.) Now this is crazy. This is what the law calls Strong Arm Robbery. Well fortunately Jodi and Kay witnessed most of the whole situation. We gave them the money and called the cops. I couldn't wait and let them take the car because I have a 30 mile commute to school three days a week. I couldn't let them take it and then fight them. Thank heaven we have a good friend that is an officer. He is going to handle a lot of the issues in the police portion of the fight. He has also had run-ins with these same crooks. I am taking this all the way if I have to. You just can't threaten someones person and transportation for money and not call it robbery!
It's just unbelievable. Here I was having just pulled up and having a smoke and two guys from Professional Auto Towing came and tried to steal my car, and wound up stealing my money. At least I had that cash... I would have been in trouble with out a car trying to fight a battle with them. All I can do is shake my head. It was mind boggling. But fight it we will. "The force is strong with this one." And Kharma is going to be hell!

Inauguration Day

Well, I didn't vote for him. Anyone that says they are a Christian and then votes for infantacide is not someone I will ever trust. However I am hoping that against all odds that he will be the best president the country and the world have ever seen. I hope he will just wow us with his actions as much as he wows us with his speeches (and not a wow in a bad way). I can't imagine that he can, but I am hoping.

Biggest Loser

In the news today is the story about the third season winner of The Biggest Loser. Why? You guessed it. He's put back on most of the weight he lost on the show. He blames it on the fact that he quit caring when the public quit watching him. Right, the public made you eat all those twinkies. He says that he feels like he let everyone down as he spiraled into depression from loss of attention and so he quit working out. Well here is the real truth, he's a fat guy doing what fat people do! And where does he go to, to discuss this horrible weight gain? Well Oprah of course. He says that after seeing Oprah going through the same problem in the news lately he realized he was not alone. Seriously? Millions of people buying into every fad diet that comes on the market trying to get rid of pounds that they have gained, and Oprah made him realize he's not alone? If you want my opinion (which you wouldn't be reading this blog if you didn't) he went back onto Oprah out of the completely narcissistic need to be back in the public's eyes. All you middle age house wives that cried at hearing his story, dry it up. He just wanted the attention. He's a fat guy. He's a normal person like the rest of us that can't afford a personal trainer, dietitian and cook. Heck, Oprah CAN afford it and she can't keep her hand out of the cookie jar either. So if she can't stay skinny, then how the hell are the rest of us supposed to? Well, we just take it one day at a time.

Kharma...

I have to say that I am a full believer in Kharma. Bad Kharma can be a SOB. I have in my life experienced the backlash of said kharma many times. Let me just tell you; it wasn't pretty. Actions have consequences.... you reap what you sow... what goes around comes around. What those sayings fail to mention is that, when it comes back around it has been multiplied and will hit you with a resounding wallop. I believe that you can bring this kind of repercussion on yourself even if the action was not intentional. Energy keeps flowing and if you create bad energy intentionally or otherwise you still made it.

In my late teen years, I knew a very sweet guy we'll refer to as Jack. Jack was head over heels for me. I absolutely adored him, but I knew from the time we met that I would never be to him what he wanted me to be. We went out, we hung out, and many nights I stayed at his house. Things were never sexual. But I kept him around as my security blanket. I cared for him and wanted the affection even if I couldn't return it. I moved to Florida after a good 6 months of this... I asked him to come, basically because I knew he wouldn't. We never really spoke after that.

Several years later I got all that back and more. I was the one head over heels for a guy. This guys spent countless days and nights with me. Again never anything sexual. This was one of two men I have ever truly fallen in love with. When he started dating someone right before my very eyes I was absolutely devastated. I sobbed for days. I got back what I gave and then some. It sucked but I will never forget it. I am ever more cognizant of my actions. I do NOT want to go through that kind of thing again. Not because of Kharma anyway.

Over the years, as we all have, there have been a handful of people that have shat upon me. And every time it happens, after the pain and or anger subsides, I think to myself Do they have any idea what they have just done to themselves? And then the next thought would have to be I sure hope I am there when it comes back on them!
Not a good christian attitude to be sure, but human nonetheless.

Kharma has been on my mind for two reasons. One, I am watching a dear friend of mine being strung along like a puppy on a leash by a girl who has no intention of doing anything but use him. Kills me to watch , but he has already vested so much of his heart into her that there is no telling him. Eventually her true colors will show. Sadly, her case differs from mine slightly. I don't believe she even cares for him at all other than the attention he gives her.
And the return on that invested kharma is really going to suck for her!
Two, I took care of seven women today at lunch. ( I am a server while I am going to school) They only order 3 entrees between the seven of them. On top of that they told me they didn't want an appetizer. They were in a hurry and asked to pay their checks as soon as the food was ordered. I obliged them. When the food arrived they told the servers who took the food that they never got their appetizer. Which they then of course got for free. This being my second day on the job, I apologized anyway and explained that I was new. I forgot to add gratuity to the table, due to all the split checks (we add gratuity to all parties of 6 or more) And they left me less than ten percent tip. Eighteen to twenty percent is for good service. Fifteen Percent for less than good service. Ten Percent if their was truly a problem and you spoke to the manager. There was a hiccup or two but I was attentive and they never ran out of drinks. They got their checks promptly and etc. These women were just cheap. Seven people split three meals... Come on!
For those who don't know: IF YOU CAN"T AFFORD TO TIP WELL, DON"T GO OUT TO EAT!
You try making 2.13 an hour! Yes that's right, 2.13 an hour. We don't get paychecks after taxes. The government expects you to make at least 12 percent tips. 10 percent doesn't cut it!
And while I am at it let me say this... If you dock a server's tips because they make a mistake, or worse yet because the kitchen cooked things improperly is WRONG! Does your boss dock Your pay because you make a mistake? Cause that is what you're doing! Or does your boss dock your pay because someone in the same office with you made a mistake? See my point? If the server is rude or inattentive I can certainly understand. If you are forced to get a manager to get things taken care of then certainly. I should stop, my blood pressure is going up the more I think of this!

So to all seven of you that I took care of today. Kharma is coming for you! And to the nice gentleman that paid for the three gentlemen I took care of and left me the nice tip, Thank you!

Commercials...

With the Super Bowl looming in the near future commercials have been on my mind. When my friends and I were out for dinner the other night we discussed some of them. But here is my take on them.



First up: Cialis

Ok... I am still trying to figure out what bath tubs have to do with a man being able to place his "tray" in an upright and locked position. Bath tubs? On a beach? On a mountain or cliff? What in the world? Add that to the fact that you are taking this pill to get the "tray" in the upright position in the first place! Why, oh why, are they in SEPARATE tubs? I just don't get it! Not to mention that every time I see this commercial I think to myself what a hassle would it be to get hot water into those things. And the hot water would not last long... so really, they would be sitting in luke warm and quicklycooling water... outside...which again seems counter productive to the effect they are going for. I am just sayin!


Next up: Medicine for genital warts
Just awful. "I'm not just doing this for me but I am doing this for my partner." I for one would have to think twice about knowingly having sex with someone with genital warts. Which leads to my second thought... I am not having sex with anyone with out them wrapping their "tray" in Latex. Which then leads to my next thought... what if it is a serious long term relationship? That SOB better not be hiding that from me... which leads back to my first thought; which is, would I knowingly sleep with someone who has genital warts? I really can only come up with one answer to that question. Hell No! By the time all of this has run it's course through my little pea brain, it's just in time for the side effects/ warnings part of the commercial. "Do not take this medication if you have advanced HIV or AIDS" :::sigh::: If you have advanced HIV or AIDS... I am pretty sure that genital warts is the least of your worries... I mean really. Particularly when you said that you were also doing this for your partner. Now I know, I know... that genital warts are probably very uncomfortable and etc. I am sure just going through a break out would lead you to want to lessen it or not have them at all... but that just goes back to my second thought. I am not having sex without a condom! Latex is a wonderful thing! And that leads to my final thought, Note to self: "Self! Make sure you get your partner tested for STD's before deciding it's a serious relationship!!!"

I really hope the Super Bowl commercials are good this year. Greenbay already lost for the season. Lost badly acutally. And the only thing I have to hope for during this time is that I will laugh often at the commercials. Speaking of Super Bowl commercials, what ever happened to the Bud Bowl?

And a bit of Commercial humor check out Eric O'Shea for new jingles for commercials! YouTube - Eric O'Shea - TV Commercials

Red Lobster you never cease to underwhelm me

I just returned home from an evening made great by friends but with awful food. I would like to start by saying I do not go to Red Lobster by choice. But when a friend says that's where they want to go for their birthday dinner then you put on your big boy pants and go.

Now for the record I went not expecting much so that I could not be disappointed. The thing is, the part of me that loves food and has worked in the restaurant industry off and on for fifteen years can't help but be disappointed. Of course you walk into the restaurant and you get the same decor as the freecreditreport.com commercial. This is to be expected. Sad as that is. And I will say that the two servers that we had were very personable. Unfortunately that is all I can say. To start with, there were only eight of us in the party. I was baffled by the fact that we had two servers taking care of us. We are actually a fairly low maintenance table and any server worth anything at all can take care of an 8 top with their eyes closed. It was not busy in the restaurant so maybe they were both bored. Either way, despite the fact that we had two servers we had to beg for drinks. Unbelievable. For dinner I ordered the lobster and artichoke dip which is normally an appetizer. When I asked the server who was taking care of my side of the table how it was, she enthusiastically told me that is was wonderful. She told me that normally she doesn't like artichokes but that they were really good in the dip. Great! I love artichokes. The dip arrived and I took one bite and almost spit it out. Terrible... I even gave it the old college try. I ate about three more bites and just had them take it away. I then understood why she liked the artichokes in that dip and no where else. It was so overwhelmed by fish flavor that you couldn't taste them. And I do understand that is was a lobster dip. Good lobster with nothing on it, not even butter, should be a bit sweet and not fishy. But they kindly took it off the bill. Sadly what they should have done is taken it off the menu. But as my friend Steve says, There's just no accounting for some people's tastes.

I don't have a sophisticated palate but I do know what good food is, and since I do wait tables I don't get upset about service if the servers are making an attempt at taking care of me. But I do ask two things... One, give me food that is edible. Two, keep my drinks filled. If the server is swamped an I can tell they are trying then no worries. But it was a half empty restaurant and we had 2 I repeat 2 servers and we couldn't get a drink refill. Well at least I won't have to go back again until my friends birthday next year.

Let the ranting commence...

And so it begins...



I have been reading my friends blog for months now (The Mostly Unfabulous Love Life of mrthing) as well as others and I have been kind of jealous. I thought to myself: Self, you have things to say! Now if you know me in person you know that I say them often, and loudly. But how much more fun would it be if you could do it for the world! Well maybe not the whole world but at the very least, the little world you live in where the voices are! So now you can check in on my ranting anytime you want!



Oprah:

Let me just say that this whole thing about her putting on 40lbs is ridiculous! Hello! You're a Fat Girl! That's what fat people do! Now I am a fat girl, so I can say these things. Anybody who has ever been truly overweight in their life will ALWAYS struggle with their weight. It is a life long battle. Even if you have been thin for ten years, it does not matter. We fat people like food!! And even if we are busy people we are not necessarily active people. Hence the reason we are or were fat in the first place! It is a lifetime mental commitment to healthy choices one day at a time. The problem is that sometimes, life happens. Now granted she does have a problem with her thyroid. This is indeed a legitimate health issue that does cause weight gain. But Oprah! Honey! You were fat before you had this issue! You just have the misfortune to be a gazillionaire ,and; therefore every ounce of weight you put on gets splashed and exaggerated across the entire world. It is indeed hard enough to look at ones self and see it, much less have it publicized. But quite frankly, if you didn't have the money to pay cooks and personal trainers everyday you would most likely have been as unsuccessful at keeping your weight off as the rest of the world is. Why? Because you are a fat girl at heart! So quit your whining! You have the ability to pay for the best doctors and treatments available for your thyroid condition. So shut up and get back on your treadmill like the rest of us!